How to Tell Your Family & Friends you’re Getting Divorced

Divorce is not a rare experience - the emotional journey of marriage can often lead to separation and divorce, and it's important to realize that if you're unhappy, it's your right to take action. While it isn't an uncommon subject, the freedom of discussing your divorce may be seen as taboo or uncomfortable to family and friends. However, emotional support is needed through any trial, and the guidance of loved ones should not be turned away. Men's divorce attorney, Kenny Leigh and Associates would like to assist you with some tools to stand you up and keep you moving forward through tough times.

Your spouse must be the first to know that you are seeking a divorce. It is likely that you will find conflict in this matter; however, it is important to recognize that you stay unified and at peace for this conflict. If you have children, you must remain calm and consistent; do not tell your children until there is a definite and finalized agreement. Once you're certain there will be a divorce, talk to your spouse about finding an attorney. From this step, you will begin to discuss a plan of action and a process to take that suits both of you. Regardless of the trials of marriage, divorce should not be a time of unnecessary stress and chaos.

Be Honest with Yourself and Others

Are you ready to talk to your family and friends? Honesty is key. Your choice to confide in others is one that takes careful consideration and to know the possible results ahead of time; opening up on a subject such as divorce to a loved one has a very uneasy outcome as some family members are known to guilt and question your reasoning for divorce. The only method to take is to be as honest and forthcoming with your reasons, knowing that they are your solid basis. Remember that only you know the variables and outcomes of your marriage. Most likely, your spouse will be talking to her parents as well - and unfortunately, the possibilities of bitterness between relatives may take its toll on your relationship with your in-laws. Do not feel shaken; your divorce is a choice made with or without them. Do not allow others to guilt you into or out of a decision as an adult; this was a decision you made with your wife, and with no one else involved.

If you have children, tell them as you would any loved ones, but do leave out inappropriate information. When you and your spouse are emotionally ready to discuss the divorce with your children, you may do so together or separately - but there is a need to help the child understand the situation as simply as possible and support them, however they may react. Discuss with your spouse before going to the children with this matter, as choice of words can play heavily on their reaction and how they continue to see you both. If you give too much detail about the other parent, children will see this as bad-mouthing their other parent, which leads to blame or unintentionally forcing them to choose sides, no matter how you word it to them. Your spouse should be clear on these issues and keep unified with you on this matter - even if you are divorcing, it's important to keep a strong value of consistency for your kids, as it plays a huge role in your relationship with them. If you have children, this keeps a relationship going between your spouse and parents - for the sake of the children, which cannot be changed. It's important to keep ill words and thoughts to yourself as it can wreak havoc upon an already sensitive situation. Make sure your children are assured that they are not the cause of the divorce, as children are known to blame themselves for their parents' arguing or any trouble in the home. Do stay consistent with them, and don't let the stress of divorce show in front of them; it makes it harder for them to cope and understand.

Always stay calm. Irrational emotions can build from exceeded stress and can unnecessarily burden you in ways that affect the outcome of your relationship with loved ones. The approach may be difficult, but once you've made this decision, it was never with irrational thought or without solid reasons. The attorneys for men at Kenny Leigh and associates have five offices: Jacksonville, Gainesville, Fleming Island, Daytona and Boca Raton, here to guide you every step of the way and help you remain strong during these hardships.
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